DTV Has Made Me an Addict for PBS
Prior to the magic glowing box of TV greatness, I could only sort-of, occasionally, if the weather was right, the wind was blowing in a clockwise swirl, and I was wearing my tin foil hat and silver underwear with the extra boning in the bra, get in a fuzzy black and white Miss Marple.
Now the magic glowy box of TV greatness (henceforth to be known as Fred) beams me 3 channels of PBS, including one in Spanish. 2 hours of Antiques Roadshow, 2 hours of Make ‘em Laugh, 2 hours of Miss Marple, and now some BBC show with three old men with funny accents. My mind is reeling with questions: What did I do before PBS? How did I survive without Fred for so long? What does PBS broadcast after midnight? (I’m picturing wholesome, but somewhat lewd, programs, like Nova’s The Journey of the Sperm or something) Why does Fred want me to have 3 channels showing the current weather? Why are these three old British men wearing coolers on their feet like snowshoes?!
I’ve discovered the public broadcasting version of fire. Life may never be the same.
HA! the old men are trying to ski down a green hill on the cooler lids. Oh god this is great. OH PINK SPANDEX AND WHITE TIGHTS! JOY!
Ding Dongs, Nutty Bars, Zingers | Comment (0)Insert Finger Up Nose
Things I Need to Have Happen Now:
1. SW-13 vim-/- cells to magically appear in the very first cane I pull out of the ginormous liquid nitrogen tank. I need those stupid cells, and do not look forward to subculturing out individual vim-/- cells from a mixed population. If I have to do that, I might stab myself in the face with a pointy, liquid nitrogen-y cold 
piece of metal.
2. GFP to stop randomly sticking to Z-lines. My mellow was also harshed when I discovered that ALL colors of fluorescent proteins stick to Z-lines. For some reason, I thought that if you changed it from green to red, it would stop being stupid. Lo. Just like a crayon, it tastes like wax no matter the color.
3. This ridiculous Sea and Shells lace thing to be done. Not because I don’t think it’s pretty, but because I cannot work on this thing without swearing like a sailor. Knitting is supposed to be relaxing, not something that causes me to create large strings of non-sensical swearing, such as “Sweet mother fucker of fuck what the oh my fuck fuck shit.”
4. My cat has to stop waking me up at 5 a.m. by running his claws over the metal faceplate of the electrical socket nearest my bed. It’s not only the most irritating sound known to man, but it also causes me to worry that one morning I’ll hear “*scrrraaaaaaape* *ZAP* MEOROWWOW” and then smell something funny. And that’s not how I want to start a morning.
5. Something exciting to land in my mailbox. Or a new game that doesn’t involve a TV show. Or something.
Come on. Wake me from my slumber, world. I’m feeling twitchy.
Ho-Hos, Knitting, Work, Zingers | Comment (0)